Today I’m gonna bring you into the intimacy of my household.
We are best friends now, I feel comfy opening the doors of my house to you.
As you know I have a dog, a fluffy ball of black hair and sand, whose antics often make me laugh.
If you are pet owner you know it has its perks, but there are things few people talk about. And that my friends is my mission. I was born to, among other things, talk about those things.
So, Doggy sleeps in my room, not on my bed, he prefers to sleep under it.
A couple of nights ago at around 3-4am. I was in my REM sleep moment when I thought I heard that dreaded noise, the noise that makes you jump and run like crazy, that noise dogs make when they are about to plaster your carpet with barf.
Luckily for me, I have no carpet and I was convinced I was dreaming.
Woke up to a room totally dark, walked towards the door and then, disaster!
Yes! Yes my friends, it wasn’t a dream! I step on the biggest pile of barf I’ve ever seen.
It was huge! The kibble was whole too, it oozed in between my toes.
I wanted to die, I wanted to cut my leg off.
I prayed for the lord to take me. But he didn’t.
I felt like Jasper, the one-legged slave from the deleted Wizard of Oz scene (you’re welcome).
I limped to the bathroom to wash my foot and came back to clean Doggy’s mess.
While I was doing so, Doggy approached me and looked at me with disgust.
I looked back at him and asked:
Why aren’t you like other dogs?
Why don’t you eat your own barf?
Why you have to be like that?
He smirked and walked over my hand, leaving me to deal with his barf.
Now I ask you:
Does your dog eat his own barf back?
Have you ever think your dog does things just to spite you?
Have a good hump day.