Just to spite you!

Hello kids,
Today I’m gonna bring you into the intimacy of my household.
We are best friends now, I feel comfy opening the doors of my house to you.

Please come in.
Please come in.

As you know I have a dog, a fluffy ball of black hair and sand, whose antics often make me laugh.
If you are pet owner you know it has its perks, but there are things few people talk about. And that my friends is my mission. I was born to, among other things, talk about those things.

Whack!
Whack!

You’re welcome!
So, Doggy sleeps in my room, not on my bed, he prefers to sleep under it.
A couple of nights ago at around 3-4am. I was in my REM sleep moment when I thought I heard that dreaded noise, the noise that makes you jump and run like crazy, that noise dogs make when they are about to plaster your carpet with barf.

Luckily for me, I have no carpet and I was convinced I was dreaming.
Woke up to a room totally dark, walked towards the door and then, disaster!
Yes! Yes my friends, it wasn’t a dream! I step on the biggest pile of barf I’ve ever seen.
It was huge! The kibble was whole too, it oozed in between my toes.

My bad!
My bad!

I wanted to die, I wanted to cut my leg off.
I prayed for the lord to take me. But he didn’t.
I felt like Jasper, the one-legged slave from the deleted Wizard of Oz scene (you’re welcome).

I limped to the bathroom to wash my foot and came back to clean Doggy’s mess.
While I was doing so, Doggy approached me and looked at me with disgust.
I looked back at him and asked:
Why aren’t you like other dogs?
Why don’t you eat your own barf? 
Why you have to be like that?
He smirked and walked over my hand, leaving me to deal with his barf.

Now I ask you:
Does your dog eat his own barf back?
Have you ever think your dog does things just to spite you?

Have a good hump day.

Advertisements

17 comments

  1. Gosh – that would be a real major “icky” event to step in a major barf pile…..then have your very own dog who did the barfing not even have the decency to “recycle” to keep his very own caretaker/Dad/best buddy from having to do the cleaning up! Remember though that we are THEIR slaves…he expected you to fix it for him. It’s what we do. Or at least it’s what they THINK we should do. Thank you for inviting us into your world – barf and all…..life isn’t always pretty (or barf-free!).

    Pam

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Okay, I don’t watch Family Guy much and the one time I did was when the dog Brian eats his own barf and Stewie’s diaper. I’m still emotionally scarred. Kobi does not eat her own barf or other dogs barf. Or most poo. She does like moose poop though. She prefers to puke outside and does her best to warn me. She’s a lady.

    I’ve stepped in lots of cat barf as they like to puke at 3am in at least 3 random spots to improve the odds of me stepping in it. I still love them.

    Like

I'd give you 2 cents for your thoughts but I'm broke

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s